A big, belated thank you to Joe Polish, for interviewing me about Should You Date Nate on his I Love Marketing podcast.
“What the heck do I write, to attract a woman?” I asked myself.
I had no idea.
When I first began writing the toughest salesletter of my life, my advertising had already sold over one million dollars of products online.
I knew how to shock people into paying attention to a message about their health. And get them excited to bust out their credit card for a nutritional supplement.
But attract a woman? What was the best way to do that, in print?
As I began, I considered the challenges I was facing:
After listing out the challenges, I considered what I was really trying to do. And not do.
Doing this exercise allowed me to look at my challenges from a different angle.
Instead of trying to face them head-on and getting a mental block, I considered them within the context of what I did and did not want to do. I meshed everything together. Then I could turn my challenges into advantages.
For instance, it no longer mattered if most women my age ignore and despise advertising. Because the woman for me would think my ad for a date is cool.
It also didn’t matter if advertising myself for a date seemed weird or unattractive, because a woman with a similar off-beat and non-conformist personality would appreciate the ingenuity.
What about generating sexual chemistry?
I pretty much suck with women
But I’ve learned enough to realize I had two advantages:
Putting a profile on Tinder or Match is the opposite of bold. You’re just another guy. No wonder so many women complain about the modern dating culture. The dick pics don’t help. Dating profiles barely have reach, either. You’re lost in a swamp of mediocrity. No sexual chemistry.
But an entire website for a dating profile? That stands out. Nobody else does it. It’s bold. That can be attractive. To everyone? Heck no. But, I only needed one woman.
Then there’s reach. Because of my ability to advertise, I could get my message in front of women I would otherwise never meet. This exponentially improved the odds of matching with a woman who’d be physically attracted to me.
That’s part of the big picture… but there’s one more thing I want to cover next time.
It has to do with why I deliberately wrote things to piss people off
And drive women away.
Next time, I’ll dive into that.
In the meantime, consider how you can use this mental process for yourself.
What challenges you most about winning over your potential customers? List everything. Write it down.
Next, write down the business relationship you want to create, with your customers. How are you helping them? Short-term? Long-term? Who is a good customer for you? Who is not at all a fit? (Hint: List as many “not a fit” categories as you can and make them as large as possible).
Now, look at both your lists, and consider how you can turn your challenges into advantages, based on what you really want to do and who truly is a good match for you.
Oftentimes you’ll find, as I did, that the solution to your challenges is not giving a shit what most people think about you.